The Triathlete Rules (from 2012)

Made me chuckle again, still fairly apt

#35. Learn to pee on yourself. You’ll spend $5,000 dollars to shave 55 seconds but won’t pee down your leg to save 3 minutes?

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What rule is sh!t yourself?

:waving_hand: Taylor
:waving_hand: not tri, but a couple of people at Manchester Marathon

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Folks that manage to piss themselves when running still blows my mind. I mentally and physically can’t do it. The chaffing must be horrendous too.

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It’s weird. I find what you say to be true on the bike, I’ve only ever managed it once (in a 100 mile TT). Never been able to in an ironman, despite trying. Yet whilst running is a piece of pi$$ :face_with_hand_over_mouth:

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I can only just about do it in the wetsuit, almost have to stop.

I do remember the person in front of me cocking his leg and doing it on the windiest part of the course in Frankfurt :nauseated_face:

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The chafing is fine, just like a swimrun. It’s the foot blisters from wet shoes if it’s particularly a lot/multiple times.
Or so I’ve heard.

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Nothings changed here

#19. Qualifying for Kona and your local “wellness” or “anti aging” clinic do not go together . If by some coincidence you decide your wanker doesn’t work right the exact same time you’re trying to get to Kona, stop everything and look for a new sport. Getting HGH, Testosterone and EPO shots in the name of ‘aging’ or wiener health won’t fly here. There are sports where cheating seem to be acceptable like here and here, so try those sports. This isn’t one of em.

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Never been able to piss on the bike; did it once in a swim (Outlaw); and easy to piss when running - although be careful if you have muddy legs as people will know! (Toughguy)

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Getting the stink out of your shoes is ‘problematic’

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Tough guy. 2011. The January edition.

So miserable, my mate just pissed himself in front of perhaps 200 onlookers after an obstacle.

Obvious what he was doing. The competitors around us not fussed. Some onlookers horrified.

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Or just don’t pee :woman_shrugging:t2:

The golden syrup that passes the next day doesn’t burn at all :joy:

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Or if you pee on an IM run, make sure you aren’t chafed first - boy does that sting!! IMCH - had to pour a bucket of water down the shorts to take the discomfort away.

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I genuinely tried to pee on the iM Wales run a few years ago and just found I couldn’t. Obviously if stopped I could but then you just dash into a portaloo…

On the bike is fine after following @funkster ‘s method of unclipping a foot, rolling your trisuit up and going for it, followed by a bit of water to rinse off.

Been a long time since I did that but the ketosis type smell is overpowering even with a rinse, wouldn’t do it again. Rather have the break and stretch.