Oak Banana is what you need 
I went with the Velcro version because of this
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Mine broke, so I now use the little, thick elsatic band you get with a phone or similar that keeps the charger cable tidy in the packaging.
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I’m guessing not a park run?
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Wow +1 for the concern! I’ve been itching 
The Garmin new ones are garbage, I bought a pack of about 10 spares online after one snapped 
they were only a few quid from the tat shop.
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Yeah that’s what I get for buying a cheap replacement strap, it broke fairly quickly again. I’ve been meaning to replace it for about a year now!
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300g per hour fuelling, all the rage now
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Does it get fucked up by sweat?
Not at all IME, sometimes you’ll see a salt line on there but it doesn’t chafe. They dry very quickly when they get wet and don’t irritate if it stays wet.
Really useful design if you need to wear it outside of a jacket and then loosen off to remove the jacket because you don’t have to take it off your arm completely.
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I had a cheap nylon nato strap that got all crusty after a few months, not had a good experience with other amazon replacement straps (ended up losing my fenix at Waldsee) so sticking with oem for now
I wouldn’t use any other type of strap now, they are brilliant. I’m not sure they are compatible with every Garmin though?
They are really good and if is wet and sweaty then a quick soapy wash and it is good to go again. I really like that you can get the tension just right with the velcro and a lot easier to put on in T1/T2 as Hayden Wilde does if you are worried about losing it in the swim
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I’ve got the Rugged Velcro strap you can get on Amazon & it’s the best Garmin strap I’ve used so far. The watch never sat right on my wrist with regular straps & like you say you can get it just right 
.
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